absent fathers: by a grown up son.

Today I was reading this book on Greek Philosophy called "The 10 Golden Rules" by M.A. Soupios & Panos Mordoukoutas and I was checking out the chapter on the Second Law that states: Worry only about the things that you control. With the notion that fathers day is this Sunday. Ripping me up in my head while reading this chapter was all the anger I have for my biological father whom I don't care too much for, as a friend nor a father figure. With my anger I quoted to myself that I needed to extract all of my pain that I was feeling at that moment, flip it & channel it on paper. So I wrote this poem as if I were able to talk to him.
& This piece is called,


Absent Fathers: By a Grown Up Son
By: Divine Giray

A Grudge
is something I cannot give you
I don't like grudges
I don't like pain
I hate hurt
& that whole 'Pain is Love' quote
is quite a skewed.
Revenge is a cowardly trait
That teaches consequences to children
As that is what they do.
Deep in my heart
I have a lot of Love for you.
Because without your seed,
I could not be.
So I Thank You,
& honor you for giving me life to breathe.
I understand Love, The Moments, Intercourse, & Separations
Marriage/ Divorce & Unfortunate Situations
Although I may not agree with you
I know that,
I cannot control your actions
& neither you can mine
For we are human, imperfectly
& that's what makes us fine.

I will not wallow in Self-Torment
Over the past I cannot Control
I must move forward in my Life
In order for me to grow Old
All I can do is wish you the Best.
& ask for you to wish that back into my life
So I can destroy my ill feelings
& get over from all this strife

(Worry only about the things you can control in life, and make them better.)


Hopefully this piece will touch others whom also have absent fathers in there lives.

vacations zones.

The cool thing about being a Subway Poet is that I can go on a Vacation when ever I want. But of course like any company I must acquire my time from saving my money. I think it is very imperative that we take time to enjoy life out of work to feel the breeze, smell the roses, enjoy the life that you are working for. Isn't that the reason why we work? I understand how some people fall in love with there work and then become it. Which is fine for, 'to each his own' but I have been there and done that & I have missed some very important times with loved ones from picking work over special moments, for example on my Mothers 60th Birthday I worked instead of planning to go to California to spend time with my family, here I was in a Greenwich Village Starbucks moping floors while my brother called me on my break telling me about the celebration. That really ate me up.


Now that I'm free from corporations and am actually on my journey of being a great poet (The reason why I moved to NYC). I have to set my own schedule. I really love getting on the train and sharing my poetry with the public, Sometimes I don't even take days off. So the past two weeks I decided to take a Vacation. & I had a really good time enjoying the City. My Mom and Auntie came out last friday from out of town and we all stayed at the Westin in Times Square. We went to experience Dance Africa in Brooklyn, I had the opportunity to take them to my Church in Harlem (First Corinthians Baptist Church on 116th & Adam Clayton Powell Blvd. if you are interested in attending they have 8 and 10:45am services) We saw some plays "By the way, Meet Vera Stark"; "The Motherfucker with a Hat"; "The Book of Morman" and they saw "Sister Act" without me :( We went to Coney Island, Rode the Wonder Wheel, The Soaring Eagle, Walked the Boardwalk, We just had a blast. I only get to see my family like once a year so we really concentrated our time together and had a real good time. For me it was more like a Staycation but in the future as I get more successful with my poetry I plan on taking more real Vacations. For they baptize our minds and give us our euphoria's of existing, well at least for me.


I want to leave you with this poem I wrote in the Bronx this one is called,

Vacation Zones
By: Divine Giray

Take me to a place
where the sun shines in winter
& is mellow in summer
but can toast my melanin
to a golden brown dinner
that entices companionship to quiver
like I was a chicken tender
soaking in the heat
as I bake in the waters
that is transparent in its clarity
seeking in the sky
electric blue oceans
granting Hawaiian like waves
let me swim in fuji rivers,
high in alkaline
shower me of these waterfalls of mine
meet my soul
bathing and relaxing
chilling in my healing
from all the stress and chaos
that my boss likes to share with me
at this hell hole I call work in the city....
GET ME AWAY!
Let me  actually enjoy my living
instead of earning it
Give me 80 hours of free time for me,
to sip tropical colada's in Pineapple or Coconut Shells
Let me dwell in good company
evoking truthful conversations
give me a better understanding
in definitions of white sand beaches, killer whales, & flounder fishes.
Can I sing songs with the locals,
discovering new languages,
without Rosetta Stones?
Let me inherit the cultures where I choose to go.
Place a Patois accent on my flow
turn my sunshine into Indigo
Moonlight
So I can connect the constellations in the clear skies
Open my eyes to be alive
I want the feeling that wants to never go back home
Never mind the twilight,
take me to the Vacation Zone.

(Everybody needs a vacation in life, make sure you take some time to enjoy yours,Your life that is.)