out of the comfort zone.

Sometimes I just want to get out of my body and say, get up off your ass and do something! That voice, I tend to ignore alot. But I know if I start to listening to it more I can start making dope moves in my life. (i,e, the movie fresh.) Starbucks, the Bed, My Studio in the Bronx, and my current state are comfort zones that I have to get out of. (Well starbucks pays the bills for now.. therefore Im thankful, but desire a new gig that meets me @ my current paygrade.)
I swear that I got caught up in the struggle of living in NYC. From living in Harlem, being a citizen of NY's Shelter Ststem, from getting my own Apartment on a subsidy, from getting off the subsidy to my current Reality. I got caught up in my own independence trying to stand on my own two feet that I kind turned my back on my dreams. Without no struggle there is no progress, right? Well right now Im ready for the progress.
I want to start trying harder to start the journey of my dreams that I think are fading away, finding the balance of holding my own and dreaming. Recapturing my creativity, and taking care of myself inside and out. Mind, body, and soul.
When I was young I remember I went to camp with my mom and her singing group and one of the musicans got drunk and called me a spoiled brat, I was a pretty sheltered child so hearing that got me furious, I was so angry.. But as I look back at my life I must agree that yes I was a little spoiled. And I currently tend to spoil myself. If I had more dicipline I wonder where I would be? Would I have graduated cumLade at Howard University? Would I have my Brownstone in Harlem??
I don't want to live a spoiled life. & ten years from now I don't want to be asking myself this. I want to say wow, look where my hard work has taken me, I've strived hard for what I got, and I'm proud of myself.
I can actually say those things now. But ten years from now I want to have a carrer, I want to own some property, I want to not worry about finances, I want to be financially savy, I want to keep my dreams alive, I want to be healthy, I want to be strong and stay the humble person I am. Life is a beautiful thing. Why? Because one can change.. I know one day I'll get there, but I must stop dreaming and start taking action to get there. Dicipline makes life easier, it's time to organize my life. like that deadprez song used to say back in the day.